Zadie's POV:
Nasa tapat kami ng bahay ng biological parents ko. Kasama ko si Cloud dahil ito ang naghatid sa 'kin.
"Are you sure hindi ka na magpapasama sa 'kin?" paninigurado pa nito. Tumango naman ako at ningitian siya. "Good luck then."
Pinagmasdan ko ang papalayong kotse nito hanggang sa hindi na ito maabot pa ng mga mata ko. Napabuntong-hininga naman ako at muling tumingin sa mansion nila.
It's been 10 years...
Muli akong napabuntong-hininga at pinindot ang doorbell. Sinalubong naman ako ni Ate Marie, ang isa sa mga maid nila rito.
"M-Ma'am Zadie, a-ano pong ginagawa niyo rito?" tanong niya. Bakas ang gulat sa kaniya mukha nang makita ako.
"Gusto ko lang kausapin si Papa, nandito ba siya?" sambit ko naman. Napakunot pa ako ng noo nang makita ko na parang gulat na gulat parin ito.
"A-Ah-"
"Papasok na lang po ako," putol ko sa kaniya. Si Ate Marie ang isa sa mga nagtatanggol sa 'kin noon kapag nakatalikod si Mrs. Villin. Patago niya kaming pinapakain at inaalagaan noon ni Zion pangit. "Huwag kayong mag-alala. Hindi naman po siguro ako sasaktan ni Mrs. Villin."
Tumango lang ito at naunang bumalik sa loob. Dumaan siya sa likuran habang naglakad naman ako papunta sa pintuan nila. Hinila ko ang slider at saka pumasok.
"Ms. Jin, nandito ba si Dad?" bungad ko rito nang siya ang bumulaga sa 'kin sa pinto.
"Y-Yes, ma'am. Nasa kusina po silang lahat," sagot sa 'kin nito at sinamahan ako sa kusina. Nakakailang hakbang palang ako ay bigla na lamang akong napako sa kinakatayuan ko.
"How about the reception, okay na ba?" tanong ni Mrs. Villin.
"H-Hindi pa po namin naasikaso, mom."
"Is that so? Well, may alam ako na makakatulong sa 'yo," sambit pa ni Mrs. Villin.
Para akong nasemento sa kinatatayuan ko. Ni hindi ko magawang makagalaw. They were happy eating and chatting about the upcomming wedding of my sister and my man.
Napapikit ako. Ano pa bang masasakit na eksena ang kailangan kong makita? Is it not done yet?
"There she is, Zadie Aria Chrysler, ang isa ko pang anak!"
They were shocked when they all saw me and so I am. How dare she say that I'm her child?! Is it because nandito ang mga magulang ni Vince? I scoffed. Samantalang noon, kahit nandito ang mga bisita niya, she not used to call us her children. She even looked like she was about to vomit habang sinasabi niya ang mga iyon.
"Z-Zadie, a-anak anong ginagawa mo rito?" tanong ni Papa. Halatang nagulat ito nang makita ako.
"I-I was about to talk to you, but I-I guess it's not the right time for that. I'm going-"
"Stay. Why don't you join us? You're also a family, hindi mo man lang ba iko-congratulate ang kapatid mo?"
Damn! I want to punch her right now! I don't care if she is my real mother. Alam kong ginagawa niya 'to para mas lalo akong masaktan. That's what she want since then.
"That's a great idea! Naalala ko tuloy nung huli tayong nag-dinner. Samahan mo na kami, hija," aya pa sa 'kin ng father ni Vince. My father was about to disagree when I joined them.
"Good evening Tita, Mr. Toxillo," bati ko pa at tuluyang naupo sa tabi ni Kuya Khalil dahil doon lang may bakanteng upuan. "Hi, Kuya Khalil."
"Good evening din sa 'yo, hija."
"Zadie, h-hello."
Ningitian ko lang sila at kumain na para bang wala akong pikealam sa mga pinagsasabi at kwentuhan nila. Ni hindi ko rin pinasadahan ng tingin ang kapatid ko at soon to be husband nito.
I was about to eat the food na kinutsara ko nang magsalita si Mrs. Villin. "Like what I said, Zadie can help you for the reception. Noong bata si Zadie mahilig siya mag-design at siya rin ang nag-design ng kasal ng mga pinsan niya," she said.
Oh, she knew that? Akala ko wala siya pakialam sa amin.
"Really? Then that's good. Hindi na natin kailangang humanap ng event organizer."
"That's right, Mr. Toxillo. At isa pa, alam ni Zadie kung anong gusto ni Rin, right?"
I was shocked by what they've said. Anong akala nila sa 'kin? I'm only a 3rd-year college student for Pete's sake. I'm not even an expert in that field. What is she planning to do?
"I-I think-"
"If my sister agreed, then I will," I answered them. If she wants to play, then I'll play with her. Sasakyan ko lahat ng laro niya at balang araw, ibabalik ko sa kaniya ang sinimulan niyang laro.
I promise that.
"Why not? I think that will be good. I rely on you, sis!" sambit nito sa 'kin. Ngumiti lang ako at nagpatuloy sa pagkain. Hanggang ngayon hindi ko siya magawang tingnan pero ramdam ko ang mga tingin niya sa 'kin.
"Excuse me," paalam ni Vince at lumabas ng dinning room. Saka ko lamang ito nagawang tingnan.
"Sis, kailan mo gagawin?" tanong sa 'kin ng kapatid ko. Napatingin naman ako rito at kay Papa.
"Maybe the day after tomorrow okay na ang lahat," sagot ko naman bago nagpaalam sa kanila. Tapos na rin naman akong kumain. "I'll wait for you sa garden, Pa."
Agad akong lumabas at nagtungo sa garden. Damn! Gusto kong magalit, gusto kong magwala. Pinilit kong maglakad patungong garden at pinilit ang sarili ko na huwag tumulo ang mga luha kong nagbabadya. Wala akong anumang nararamdaman na sakit, lahat napalitan ng galit.
I froze when I saw my man right in front of me. Sobrang gwapo at angas nitong tingnan kahit pa nakatalikod. Pft! Why I even saying that?
I let out a sigh as I stared at him. Makalipas ang isang minuto, nagpatuloy rin ako sa paglalakad. Tinapatan ko ito at alam kong dahil sa ginawa ko, napatingin siya sa 'kin.
Hindi ako lumingon sa kaniya. Diretso lang ang tingin ko. "C-Congratulation, Vince Asher. I'm h-happy for you and for my sister. I hope you'll take care of her for the rest of your life. And also, congratulation, naka-graduate ka na."
Ganiyan nga. I-congratulate mo siya gaya ng gusto ni Mrs. Villin.
I sighed, taking a three-second pause before continuing. "A-Alam kong ayaw mo akong makita, but don't worry after I planned your reception gagawin ko 'yon. But now, can you please talk to me?" sambit ko pa saka lang humarap sa kaniya. "I don't know what theme you want me to do, I only know what my sister's wants-"
"Then do it. Hindi na kailangan ng opinyon ko, just do what she wants," he cut me off, still not looking at my eyes.
"A-Are you still mad perhaps?" tanong ko. Napailing pa ako nang ma-realize ko na maling itanong ko pa 'yon. Alam ko naman na ang sagot. "B-By any chance, d-do you want me to explain-"
"Explain? Explain what? You don't have to, Ms. Chrysler, Ms. Villin o kahit ano pang pangalan mo," he cut me off again. He looked at me with his cold eyes. I even see the anger on it.
"B-But you do deserve my explanation, don't you?" I said, my voice was like a whisper.
"Please don't... natatakot na ako." I saw how he closed his eyes hardly before opening them again, glancing at the nightsky above. "N-Natatakot ako na baka maniwala ako ulit sa 'y-yo," he continued, his voice even broke. "Natatakot ako na baka paniwalaan ka ulit ng puso ko... kahit pa sabihin ng isip ko na magsisinungaling ka lang."
Tears fell from his eyes. From then, he looked at me with so much pain which broke my heart over and over again.
"Baka saktan mo lang ulit ako," he whispered.
From that moment, I badly want to hug him and say sorry, but I retrain myself. Pinilit ko ang sarili kong hindi magbigay ng anumang reaksyon sa kaniya. I can't do it, hindi pwede. Ayoko na siyang saktan pa ulit. Ayoko nang guluhin pa ang buhay niya.
***
Vince's POV:
"Let's end this. All of this is just a lie," I uttered, looking directly into her eyes.
I saw nothing but brown eyes. I can't even read what is on her mind and how she feels because of her eyes. Walang emosyon doon, blanko lang.
To be honest, I don't want to end this even if it hurts. Ni hindi ko nga napigilan ang mga luha ko. All I want is to be with her for the rest of my life. I just lie because I don't want her to know how much I'm hurting. Because no matter how many times I close my eyes, her picture is what I see repeatedly and it sucks.
No matter how much I love this girl, I still can't do anything about it. Maybe because destiny is just selfish for us.
"V-Vince Asher-"
"You have no right to call me like that, right after you just did that much damage, Zadie," I cut her off.
"T-Then do it to me. G-Gawin mo rin sa 'kin 'yung ginawa ko. Saktan mo ko," she answered.
I closed my eyes, averting my gaze at her. Baka hindi ko kayanin. Baka hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili at yakapin siya.
"Hate me if you want..."
I really want to but I can't. This is enough. Nakakalalaki mang sabihin pero pvtang*na sobrang sakit na. How I wish nakinig na lang din sana ako kay Axel when he confronted Gunner about Yna.
I suddenly remember him saying, 'Bro, don't hold on to a woman who doesn't want to be kept by you. Hindi naman sa sinusukuan mo siya. It's her who gave up on you, and it's you who shouldn't waste any more of your time than you already have.'
"Again, I don't want to see you anymore. Fine, tapusin mo 'yung kailangan mong tapusin and vanish like a bubble," I said. I maybe accept the fact that she is a Villin and she's my ex-fiancé' sister, but the fact that she didn't love me, na pinaglaruan lang niya ako, na-fling lang lahat 'yon, hindi ko matanggap. "There is one thing I regret to my bones..."
I saw her looking at me like she was waiting for my answer.
"That I truly and sincerely love you. I should never have done so. If I haven't I would not hate you so much," I added before walking away.
Know when it's time to let go, know when it's time to walk away, and know when it's time for her/him to be unkept. And that's what I did to her.
And I think this is the right time to walk away and to let her go even if it'll bring more pain to me. I just want to be with her but it sucks. I just want to love her and to love me back but she can't. Tang*na, para akong bakla.
***
"Are you sure with this bro?" Tyrone asked. We're here at the bar. After I said goodbye to Rin's family, dumiretso ako rito.
"Yeah," tipid kong sagot.
"Pero bro, alam naming lahat na hindi mo na mahal si Rin. Anong topak meron ka at naisipan mong magpakasal?" tanong pa ni Gunner sa 'kin.
I sighed and looked at the three of them. "Maybe you're right, I don't love her anymore, but pwedeng magbalik 'yung pagmamahal na nawala, bro. Kapag nagsama na kami, I know that there's a posibility na matutunan ko siyang mahalin."
I have to love her back. I don't want her to be hurt. Ayokong isipin niya na kaya ko lang siya pinakasalan dahil napipilitan ako o dahil kay Zadie.
"Gano'n na lang ba, bro? Babalewalain mo nalang lahat ng feelings at pinagsamahan niyo ni Zadie?" Axel asked.
"Hindi lang babalewalain, buburahin na niya dahil magiging asawa na niya si Rin."
I just nodded my head to the two of them. Tyrone was right, I have to erase all my feelings for Zadie. Maging lahat ng pinagsamahan naming dalawa. It won't be easy but I can do it. I hope so.
"Sinong mag-aayos ng reception niyo bro? May nakuha na ba Dad mo?" pag-iiba ni Gunner.
"Yeah and it was her," I answered and looked away. I actually don't know if she means it or not.
"Sinong her?" Tyrone asked while Axel and Gunner looked at each other. I bet they already know who is 'her'.
"Fvck! Are you serious, bro? Si Zadie ang event organizer niyo?" Gunner asked in disbelief. I just nodded.
"Nababaliw na kayo, hindi man lang kayo naawa sa tao? Syempre. masakit din para kay Zadie yon!"
"Masakit? Alam kong narinig niyo rin ang sinabi niya. She doesn't really love me at all. All of that was a lie, fake, and a mistake. I don't see anything wrong kung siya man ang magiging event organizer," I answered to Axel.
"Pero bro-"
"Siya ang may gusto no'n, let her be," I cut him off and drank my last shot.
***
Zadie's POV:
Pinunasan ko ang mga luha ako at tinuyo ang mukha ko. Hindi ko kailangang umiyak. He's right, I must vanish like a bubble.
I will, my man. I will... so you're not going to be hurt anymore.
"Zadie, hija..."
Nakangiting humarap ako kay Tita Alice. Wow, just wow. Pwede na ba akong artista? Sobrang galing ko nang umarte na para bang okay lang ang lahat.
"T-Tita Alice, m-may kailangan po kayo?" tanong ko pa rito, ngunit nagulat na lamang ako nang yakapin ako nito.
"I know it won't be easy to endure. I heard your conversation with my son, and I know it hurts. Nasasaktan ako para sa inyong dalawa but I can't do anything."
"T-Tita..."
"I tried to convince my son not to marry your sister because he doesn't even love him, pero buo na ang loob ng anak ko. I just hope he will not regret his decision," saad pa nito sa 'kin.
"H-Hindi po ba kayo galit sa'kin?" I asked. I was really shocked na nagagawa parin ako nitong kausapin after what I did to her son.
"Why would I? Is it because of what you've done to my son?" she asked which made me nod. She shook her head. "I'm not. Matapos kong pagdugtong-dugtungin lahat ng dots, I understand why you just did that. Maybe my son jumped to a conclusion na it was all lies and a mistake but I know it's not, tama ba?"
Wala sa sariling napatango naman ako at ngumiti kay Tita Alice. "Nangyari na Tita, hayaan nalang po natin. Still, I'm happy for him and for my sister."
"So what's your plan, hija? Are you willing to organize their reception? I can talk to my husband-"
"No Tita, I'm willing. Siguro po 'yon nalang 'yung tamang magagawa ko for them," putol ko sa kaniya. Muli naman niya akong niyakap hanggang sa nagpaalam na ito.
"I really hope a miracle happens..." huli niyang sinambit bagi tuluyang umalis. Gusto ko sanang umasa, kaso mukhang malabo na.
"Pa," tawag ko rito nang sunod ako nitong nilapitan. Matapos kasing sabihin 'yon ni Tita Alice ay nagpaalam na ito sa 'kin.
"Pasensya ka na anak sa mama mo-"
"Don't mention it, Pa," I cut him off at pilit siyang ningitian. "I just came here to inform you that gusto ko nang magpunta sa Canada."
Natigilan ito saglit ngunit agad ding tumingin sa 'kin, "Are you sure anak? Baka napipilitan ka lang, just like I said-"
"No, Pa. Napag-isipan ko na rin 'to. Balak ko nga right after tomorrow, but I have to organize my sister's wedding reception. After that request, I've decided to leave the Phillippines."
***
Lie Again
by: thesweetest_thing